Can you be in love with more than one person?

being in love with more than one person only happens on screen and that because most of us choose one person over the other, it means we love someone “more” and therefore we can’t “truly” love more than one person.   Is an open relationship right for you?

Does this sound familiar?  You’re not alone. It all boils down to how we define love; everyone will have their own experiences and definitions. Can we have strong feelings for more than one person? Yes. Can we envision our lives with more than one person (even if wildly different)? Yes. Can we feel sexual desire toward more than one person? Yes. Can we care about and want to support more than one person? Yes.  

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If you are currently trying to make a decision, consider the following: 

• What aspects of yourself come out with each person? 
• Do you want to commit to one or both of them? 
• Who are you compatible with?  
• Are you truly in love or are you infatuated? 

It’s essential to be curious and honest with yourself and everyone involved. Something that helps is defining how you feel about each person. Some terms get thrown around a lot and need to be clarified, making it less complicated for you to understand your experience.  

More:What does it mean if my partner is looking at racy pictures on social media?

Infatuation (which some people define as being “in love”): Intense but a short-lived sense of attraction, passion, excitement and admiration. During this phase, we often think of the other person as perfect, turning a blind eye to flaws, incompatibilities or red flags. We often idealize this person and have unrealistic expectations of what they are like. 

Love: Love is an experience built with time, intimacy and a sense of knowing who the other person is. Love is a verb, an action, and a choice of how we show up and honor our dynamic with the other person. Love is sensible, stable and respectful.  

How would you define each of these terms?  Which do you feel? 

That’s when you’ll know how you can love. 

Are you looking for sex or intimacy? There’s a difference.

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