We’re lonely. Why’s it so hard to do something about it?

For single people, Valentine’s Day and the day that follows, dubbed “Singles Awareness Day,” is a scheduled reminder of loneliness, a feeling that’s been heightened for most during the pandemic. 

Last month, TikTok user @angelicaexplainsitall highlighted the challenges of trying to conquer loneliness by taking herself out on a solo date.

“I decided I’m going to go the full year without using any dating apps, however, I still want to meet people,” she explained in the video. “It’s Friday, so I’m going to go out by myself.”

Throughout the video, we her followers watched her progressively lose her resolve, eventually ending the night in tears.

The video has been viewed more than 2 millions times, with commenters chiming in to commiserate. 

“I feel you mate, it’s hard to meet people (these) days,” one user writes.

But if so many of us are lonely, why is it so hard to put ourselves out there?

Experts say it’s always been challenging to form new social connections, regardless of whether they are romantic or platonic. But after two years of pandemic-spurred separation, it is even more difficult than it once was. 

“Social skills are like muscles, so you have to use them or lose them,” explains Camille Virginia, author of “The Offline Dating Method.”

After extended periods of separation, people feel like they are “out of practice,” explains Bisma Anwar, a licensed mental health counselor and therapist at Talkspace. The result? Increased social anxiety.

And while people want to connect, the fear of rejection plays a big role in why they’re hesitant to meet new people. 

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