Why the Kim Kardashian and Ye divorce drama is so uncomfortable to watch

Kim Kardashian filed for divorce from Ye (formerly known as Kanye West), a split she admitted was at least partly precipitated by a recognition that for all the fame and extravagance that defines her life, she was missing the “small experiences” of intimacy and connection. She was lonely. 

In the last 11 months, Kardashian has remained fairly quiet about the split, while her ex has been intensely public. He’s vacillated between professing his desire to reconcile with Kardashian and disparaging her. Most recently, he rapped about beating up Pete Davidson, Kardashian’s rumored beau, went on Instagram Live to accuse Kardashian of trying to keep him out of his daughter’s birthday party, and went public with a strange claim that he prevented a second Ray J and Kardashian sex tape from leaking. (Kardashian said the video Ye referenced contained no sexual content. Her rep said in a statement that “After 20 years, she truly wishes to move on from this chapter.”)

Kardashian and her estranged husband may have been among the most visible public couples, and the dissolution of their marriage may be playing out in exaggerated ways because of their social status and Ye’s mental health issues, but the public’s interest in their relationship may reflect more than preoccupation with celebrity culture. Mental health experts say the former pair are a litmus test for behaviors the public views as healthy or unhealthy, and may also be shining a spotlight on behaviors of ex-partners that are troubling at best and dangerous at worst. 

“When we look at celebrities, their lifestyle is symbolic for us of something we want or don’t want in our own lives. When you look at this situation, Kanye’s behavior, be it healthy or unhealthy, is emblematic for many people of what is dysfunctional in their own world or in the world at large,” said Carla Manly, a clinical psychologist and author of “Date Smart: Transform Your Relationships and Love Fearlessly.”

Kardashian and Ye are mostly unrelatable, but for many people, especially in the social media age, this chapter in their relationship feels familiar. 

“Doesn’t matter if you are famous or not because social media is a public space even for people who are just regular folks,” said Ramani Durvasula, a licensed clinical psychologist. “Having the grief of a breakup played out in a public forum never feels good. It can also feel uncomfortable and like a boundary violation if a person is using any sort of public platform as a way to bait, antagonize or communicate with someone. And obviously, these dynamics become even more difficult if children and family are involved.”

Kanye West’s heartbreak is relatable, but experts say his attempts at manipulation can be dangerous

In July 2020, Ye sent a barrage of troubling tweets following a rambling presidential campaign rally in South Carolina (he launched a presidential run in 2020).

Afterward, Kardashian posted on social media asking for empathy for her husband, whom she called “a brilliant but complicated person,” and noted that people who don’t understand what it is like to love someone with a mental illness “can be judgmental and not understand that the individual (has) to engage in the process of getting help no matter how hard family and friends try.” 

It’s unclear how the rapper’s mental health issues factor into his recent behavior, but Manly said there is still something universal about his grief. When most relationships end, it’s rare that both people agree it’s time to let go. 

“Where Kanye might be coming from, of course, is a place of heartbreak, a place of frustration, and also a place of hopelessness. And sometimes when we’re feeling hopeless and frustrated, we resort to techniques and tactics that we might not feel the need to resort to when we are at our best place in life,” she said.

His celebrity status is also a complicating factor. Manly said when someone receives attention for acting out, it can reinforce bad behavior – the attention can be intoxicating.

“It’s frustrating for people who are watching this type of behavior, who may think, ‘It’s not working for you. Why are you doing it? It’s only creating more distance. Why are you behaving in ways that are counterproductive?’ But that takes personal insight for him to be able to see that,” Manly said. “Suffering does not come with that objectivity that we really need.”

(though Ye ostensibly moved on himself, with girlfriend Julia Fox), but Lue said he is repeatedly trying to insert himself into Kardashian’s narrative, to control her narrative, to re-attach himself to her. People’s egos tell them they matter, and Lue points out that Ye has been shown to have a large one. 

“It’s the attitude of, ‘You think you can just finish it with me? You think you can just move on and parade your new partner in front of me, and look like you’ve moved on? I’m going to make sure that you can’t move on, because I’m just going to keep reminding people that you’ve hurt me, and reminding people that I still love you, and I’m the wounded party,'” Lue said. “It can feel very coercive and manipulative to be on the receiving end of that.”

Kim Kardashian remains quiet

Kardashian’s behavior has been restrained. She’s said little in the aftermath of her divorce announcement and has rarely responded to her ex publicly. She has also not addressed her rumored relationship with Davidson. She was careful during the filming of “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” to divulge little about her marital problems.

Article source: https://feeds.feedblitz.com/~/679766044/0/usatoday-lifetopstories~Why-the-Kim-Kardashian-and-Ye-divorce-drama-is-so-uncomfortable-to-watch/